Where to go on a first date?

He took me to a dingy place on date one?

My friend called me a few weeks ago complaining she went out with a guy and he took her to some dingy cheap place. I must say knowing my friend and the fact that she likes class and niceties of life I could not help laughing at her.So where do you take her for the first date? Where would  you want him to take you for a first date?

First and foremost I think where to go should be dependent on who is paying? At this day and age it would be foolhardy to ignore money in this equation. How much are you willing to spend? After establishing that find out  what does she like to do? What idea do you have, do lunch, go to a movie, dinner,go watch a play,picnic,hike. Pick a place that caters for your budget yet be sure to find out what she likes.

I have dated guys who asked me to pick a place. It is not a bad idea but what happens if I pick a place that is way beyond what you can afford. I have also found myself pointing out some of my favorite places and the dude i was telling  had something negative to say about each and everyone of those places which was a turn off. When you ask someone for some of their favorite places it helps you have an idea of what they might like, and the kind of places they go to.

Assuming money is not an issue then pick whichever place you want.Which ever place you end up going comfort is the key. Let it not be you picked a place which makes either of you uncomfortable. Comfort is the key. Am tempted to throw in fun, but well fun has a lot to do with the both of you. Throw expectations out of the window and just go with the flow,don"t go prepared with a crazy list of questions.

 I am almost certain am being cheated on!


Last Sunday I received a call from a male friend ,he was angry and agitated. He believes his girlfriend cheated but he has no concrete evidence. He did not catch her in the act but he is ALMOST certain she cheated.  Ha... talk of a sticky situation to be in?

If someone cheated on you or you suspect they did but you have no proof. They deny and you insist they are lying. Exactly what do you expect to feel if you found out they did . The fact that you suspect and even feel they did in my opinion may not actually be the big deal. Lets assume they deny and you have no proof but your gut tells you they did.The big deal is can you live with that feeling . That feeling of maybe he or she is laughing behind your back , of how they got away with it. Plus do you want to  always  look over your shoulder all the time. Do you go with your gut and logic or the incredible story that you are being given . You have no idea whether its true or not.

My advice: If you can accept either side of the story and by accepting I mean being truly on board. Let go the what if situation and make your decision. Believe them, not partly but accept their truth as the truth no buts. Next time they come home very late and say they were out with friends ,you will not start panicking, and go wild with thoughts of "they are doing it again behind your back". You will  stay yet at the back of your mind ,you never let it go.  Only stay if you can completely let it go .Don"t stay in waiting , of the day they shall screw it up all over again. Waiting to catch them for real.

Two go with your gut and reasoning and leave. Which ever you choose do it from one place, don"t do it with so many buts and whats if?  Major factor at play here , He loves this gal. Its all easier said than done but you must make a decision. Most important be honest with yourself. You matter most here. What can you live with?

After how long should I sleep with him?

My friend has been seeing this guy for a while now but she is yet to sleep with him.

She says he wants to sleep with her so much so that the topic comes up on every date.

When she asked me for advice I wondered when is the right time to sleep with a guy?

I have heard some popular arguments that if you sleep with a guy on the first date then

he will not respect you. It shows you are easy and it will probably ruin your chances of something serious happening. How long do you wait then? One month, two months, three, six, until you say I do.

I say do it on your own terms and your own time.  Forget the ideal time.

The truth is for something good to materialize it all depends with the connection you have with someone. The fact is you can not will a connection to happen.  It happens almost completely naturally. I say almost because we also have a part to play.

You may sleep with a guy six months into dating, only after you say I do or on the first date. This will not strengthen the connection you have.  Be real, do it on your own terms and time. Don’t make him wait with the idea in your head that when you finally do it will be something special, or he will think you are special. Wait because you want to. I insist do it because you want to. Note here we are talking of the first time you sleep with him.